I hope this post makes sense. I’ve come down with the flu, and though I’m getting better, I don’t know how coherent my thoughts are.
I was able to get some drawings done for my daily drawing challenge before I got sick.
I’m afraid that I hit a hard spell of self-doubt late last week. I often suffer fluxes of anxiety and depression. Last week I was brought down, hard, by looking at other artists and comparing myself to them. I know that I shouldn’t. A lot of the artists I follow and enjoy have been drawing for years and years and have gone to art school and such. I need to just enjoy what they do and try to enjoy what I do as well.
I do wonder what makes me want to keep returning to drawing and art. I fluctuate so much I’ve had a hard time seeing any improvement. I give up and put it to the side for months at a time, but then I get the urge again and start drawing, only to get discouraged again. I’m not sure why I have the drive to do art. I think this has been my longest spell of staying with it. I’ve gotten somewhat discouraged, but I’ve not gotten down as I did recently and I haven’t stopped.
Some of it is a mental issue. I’ve been trying different medications these past few years. Currently, I am on meds that I like and don’t have unwanted side effects. When I’m feeling good, things are really good. I’m not so sad and I am doing better at social interactions, both online and in person. But, when I get down, I go really down. Down enough to make myself ill. Hopefully, I’m going to see a new doctor, who can stop the mood cycles and even me out.
Anyways, I hope I can keep with it and not drive those around me away with my crazy.
Since I’m starting to get better I was able to play with some digital drawing. Enjoy this WIP.